I read all seven of these books this summer. I’m not going to take the time to summarize them- that would be silly. I will, however, amend my list of chick book types… because I’ve already found one I forgot. So without further ado, here’s Chick Book Type Nine: Just like… well, Veggietales.
Type 9: Veggietales. Okay. Veggietales is not a chick flick. But it is the only predictable Christian-themed video production I could think of. See, Type Nine is totally different from all the rest of the chick books. It’s called Christian chick lit. It’s a very strange genre. The stories are always different, but equally predictable. The theme is always THE SPIRITUAL JOURNEY. Obstacles that test our little heroes and heroines are always merely blessings in disguise. I’m not calling it unrealistic, but only in Type Nine can a person rob a prayer group at gunpoint and then join said prayer group later after a spontaneous baptism in the lake. Not to mention the trusted aunt to whom our dear little Amish girl has always turned with her problems turns out to be her real mother, praise the Lord and we’re all going to forgive each other for living a lie for 25 years! True loves return from the misunderstood grave, unconverted husbands become holy rollers, and some god-fearing child single-handedly saves a tiny little western town from the beer-guzzling thugs that would drag it down to Satan’s lair. And that’s why this crowd of books is just like Veggietales. Always a different story, but always the same ending: God wins.
Now, I want to make a quick disclaimer here. It sounds like I’m bashing this particular group of books. I’m not. Let’s not forget, first of all, that I’m bashing ALL groups of books geared toward the female mind. And second of all, I appreciate these books for what they are. I understand the Christian industry. And there IS a Christian Industry. All things with a “faith” label on them are victims of the process that is business. That is, things can only be labeled and sold as “Christian” if they’re going to fit the “Christian” mold. So that means stuff like no cussing, no law-breaking (Biblical or otherwise), have a tangible moral, and/or display a Jesus fish somewhere on it. I understand that these authors are working within a very strictly defined set of parameters, and they choose to sacrifice a little bit of quality fiction in order to give a group of women who are sick of reading about sex and shoes something to read. I get it. Good for them! Bring on the wholesome! I don’t look down on these authors or these readers any more than I do any other girlie authors or readers… and for the record, I know I have no rights to make fun of or criticize any author or reader, because 1. I certainly don’t have the guts to become and author, and 2. I read it all anyway!! (But I do make fun of and criticize because, well, it’s fun.)
That being said, I gotta say… these books were pretty fluffy. Sorry, mom. I appreciate very much the fact that they sort of gave some women (who might not have otherwise) the idea to form a prayer group. But they’re pretty unrealistic, not to mention an obvious and direct ripoff of the very popular Ya-Ya Sisterhood series (see Type 2). If there’s one thing I hate, it’s when the Christian Industry sees something that’s making cash as a trend in the real world and then they adopt it for themselves- make it a little more wholesome and suddenly it’s just as good as the original. Well, I disagree. I tend to reward original thought more than blatant attempts at financial gain. And that, my friends, is my biggest gripe about the Christian Industry. It really is only a business after all. That bit about saving souls is great and all, but it doesn’t really make the money. Leave that to the churches. We’ll suck ‘em in with our brightly colored appealing Savior Smiley Face, and then send them over to somebody who will tell them the truth about what it really means to be a Christian. Probably will come as a terrible shock, but… oh, well, they’ve already bought the book. Maybe they’ll go see the movie. And if they don’t like what they see… well, we’ll get ‘em next time. Hey, have you seen our new line of Jesus Jellies? Each bean is a different flavor that was eaten in the Bible. We’ve got fig, wine, unleavened bread, lamb, loaves, fishes…
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